Clo's Voice

5 steps to deal with a break up

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breakup

Slam. Boom.

Life Happens.

What now?

In life, we are often thrown obstacles, some that happen out of now where. Dealing with a break up is unfortunately one of them that many of us hate to deal with.

Screaming into your pillow, crying your eyes out watching those romantic movies, deleting old pictures, the worst .. coming across their things. These are just some of the heartaches that make dealing with a break up harder than imaginable.

So you just broke up with the person of your dreams. After 3 years together, everything is gone. Your bed is empty and so is your heart. You feel like your half complete.

So what now?

Smile, live and move on.

After all, tomorrow is a new day and life has to move forward.

Your soul mate is out there some where, you just haven’t found them yet. Take this break up as a good thing. Remember, practice makes perfect. Break ups help make you better at relationships for your soul mate. It helps make you a better person and helps make you stronger.

Here are five things to remember during a break up, that will hopefully make it a little bit easier:

Woman-crying-unhappy

1. Cry

It is okay to cry. Your heart is broken and you are confused. Let it all out. Sob, scream, cry some more. It is okay.

2. Save some of those memories

When you are going through a break up, especially one that had a significant purpose in your life; maybe your first love, first kiss, etc. Whatever the reason, save some memories. You will want them later on in your life. 5 or 10 years later, you will look at them and smile, either A. laughing at what you taught could be love or B. just having those memories handy. Your memories are what makes your life. Don’t remove them completely.

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3. Live your life

You can’t just lay in bed all day letting your life go to waste. Get out of bed, and continue your day as you would normally. It’ll be hard at first but before you know it it’ll get easier. Go out with friends, don’t cancel your plans, have a nice laugh. You need to remember that in life things happen, you can’t stop your life because of them.

4. Breathe

Close your eyes and take a deep breath and find your reason to smile. Everyone has a reason to smile, whatever it maybe. But you do. Is the sunset just beautiful today? Your friends, family members calling to remind you how much they love you? A pay check just come in from work? Find your reason to smile.

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5. Don’t lose hope

Although your heart may be broken at this time and you can’t even imagine being with someone else, don’t lose hope. There is someone out there for you. You just haven’t found them yet. Life your life and slowly but surely that special one will come around. Who knows, if that is ‘the one’ but just give it a ride. See if it works out, if it doesn’t just remember that life goes on. There will be someone else. Someone greater.

loveclo

38 Comments

  1. Going through a break up is never easy we like to think at the time that we just can’t live without that person. Its important to know our broken heart will mend. I like the fact that you included have hope great advise.

  2. I am so glad I have finally found the “one”. He’s my rock but we always make sure to stay ourselves and not get so caught up with each other that we neglect our own interests and needs.

  3. Thank you for the great tips. I don’t think I’ll ever have to deal with this situation but I know my grandkids will one day and your info will help them in their time of need.

  4. Elizabeth O. Reply

    Crying is definitely something that helps ease the pain of a break up. I also write, because that’s my therapy and it keeps me calm as well.

  5. Robin Rue (@massholemommy) Reply

    It’s been a loooong time for me since my last breakup, but man – they are NO fun. Thanks for the helpful tips.

  6. I’m married now and my husband totally thinks it’s weird that I still have old pictures of my first love. They are away, not out for the world to see, but he has never understood why I’ve kept them (and to honest, I’m sure he has always been a bit self conscious because of it). I definitely think it’s important to have those memories, especially when we’re older looking back at our life in our early 20’s.

  7. It’s never easy. I always think it’s smart to take some time before jumping into another relationship. You need to be good with you before you can be good with anyone else.

  8. These are great tips. Just have to remember that every person is put in your life for a reason. Maybe that person wasn’t meant to be “the one,” but was put in your life for a different reason.

  9. Such great advice…this can be a relationship with a friend too! It’s hard to say goodbye to someone you love…thanks for sharing!

  10. Break ups are the worst. There are so many different emotions that just overwhelm you, even when you’re the one who wanted to break up.

  11. These are really great tips! I went through a divorce several years ago. It was hard at the time, but my life is so much better now.

  12. Yes definitely cry. Keeping inside will just make it worse. And NEVER lose hope. Things will get better. Everything happens for a reasons.

  13. Break ups can be so hard to get through. These are all great tips. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

  14. I love that you said to save some of those memories. Every heart break changes who you are, makes you a better person. You should save those!

  15. I hope to not have to deal with a break up ever again. I like being married, but these are some great steps to help!

  16. Break ups can be very hard on the heart, they are not easy to go through. Great tips to help get through it.

  17. These are great tips! Break ups can be so hard. My ex-husband is a horrible person, but I was still really sad when it was over.

  18. These are some great tips! I’m sure my daughters will be going through break ups when they get older. I’ll keep these in mind for when those times come. I’m definitely not looking forward to that though.

  19. What great advice. I remember always trying to throw out everything that reminded me of the relationship, then I would miss all those things when I was ready to deal with it all

  20. Breakups are always so hard to go threw. Crying is a great way to release some of the sadness that overwhelms you.

  21. My teenagers have been threw a few breakups now and it is so hard to watch them feel so sad. Crying can be great therapy. Your best friend is a great support to have with you.

  22. Jennifer Sikora Reply

    I can remember all of those nasty breakups when I was in high school. Thankful that I never have to go through that again!

  23. There were a couple of relationships I tossed out the memories, and I regret that. I didn’t do it at break-up time, but much later when I was getting married. I kinda wish I had them to show my kids the silly people I dated.

  24. This is a thoughtful post that I think a lot of women and men will appreciate since going through a breakup can be very painful. It is so true that you need to keep some of the memories while at the same time look to the future to move on to open yourself up to love again when you finally meet the right person.

  25. Sabrina @ Dinner, then Dessert Reply

    A break up can be such a devastating experience! Stay strong and work through those feelings!

  26. ah some of these I can’t do. I haven’t cried, my memories are lost (tangible ones anyway), and I just am too busy ‘doing’ to be sad over something I lost that was very precious to me for a very long time. I wonder if it will catch up with me someday.

  27. After a tough break-up I dealt with, I would read “Choosing Happiness” by Veronica Ray. I would time myself to be unhappy and then pick myself back up and do something else. It can be hard. I know.

  28. Because... I'm cheap Reply

    I went through a difficult break up before. So the #5 was super important. Took awhile to get hope back. But it came 🙂

  29. I agree, when it feels like the world is crashing down around us, it’s important to breath deeply and remember to take a larger perspective on life. All of our choices – whether mistakes or not – help us to grow and give us a depth of understanding.

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